9 August 2018 – A love letter to myself
Why I’m writing this letter here?! Because Yoga for me is a practice of training on a mat simple things that
teaches you how to stand in front of the biggest things life offer us every day.
I can’t believe I’m really forty…if I look behind I had so many intense moments in my life, and at the same time, I feel.. it was yesterday I was playing cowboys with my brother.
I don’t have a good memory, but I have a lot of emotion, sensation, smell memories that always surprise me when they happen.
I learnt so many things and anyway I always feel frustrated cause I’d like to learn more, to be able to do amazing acrobatics tricks, to practice yoga every day and fly in every handstands, traveling light, to reach the top of many mountains, swimming in every lake and every sea, to read million of books …and of course I can continue this list forever.
But if I have to say just one world to tell all my life I say
“Grazie”
the same that “Thank you”, but it’ s one of the few worlds I prefer in Italian, it sounds much closer to “Grace”, and that’s what I feel.
It’s a grace to be able to feel Gratefulness
I’m still learning to bow to everything is coming to me, and today I’m going to do it as first thing as I open my eyes.
Here a list of some of the people I’m grateful for being in my heart,
Francesco, Mr Acroseeds, my home…thanks to be my base, to share your life, the good and the fatigues with me. For the unconditional love I can see in your eyes, worlds, gestures…
Giacomo Shiva, with you I started the “being a mom” path, for your sweetness, for the times I hear you to say Grazie, for your open heart and generosity, for being my Zen master!
Elia Arjuna, thank you for your eyes that say to me in every moment how much you love me. Every time our eyes meet you smile and move all your body to reach for me. Another Zen master in my life!
I have to say that my parents taught me this world and his meaning, I’d like to being able to thank them more than what I currently do. Mom and dad I can feel your love, even in our fights!
My sister, we had such a hard time together, and something changed growing, becoming moms, I feel you so inside my heart that sometimes I don’t even realize it. I want to thank you and my brother for your love.
Nicoletta, you opened my eyes to the vitality of the body, for the first time (and I was already thirty!) I felt alive, I felt human and I’ve being able to hug myself. Thank you for having kept your eyes on me, without hurting, but listening deeply and grounding me.
Julia (the both I know), I love your name first of all, and I love the things you brought in my life, you are “The” mama example for me.
Giordana, one of my best friend, your door is always open …and it’s also thanks to you If ‘m able to celebrate my forty today!
The Italian Acrowomen: Irene, Marta, Paola, Alice, Francesca (at least two)…it’s a community of wisdom that talks to me every time we meet,
All my acroyoga teachers, for the gifts I received, I can’t live without it anymore!
The Acromamas group…we are ONE!
Jill…you deeply touched my heart when you bowed to me that day…I’ll never forget.
My Yoga teachers…this practice makes me feel myself…and we always strive to find ourselves!
And the Sori community:
Annalisa, I’m so grateful I found you, a new sister! Thanks for being so honest, clear, open, helpful…a real friend.
Giulia, everyone should meet her…she’s THE DOULA, che gift me a community…I can’t ask for more
and all the adopted grandmothers of my kids…
You are my hands in those past weeks and you make me feel I’m in the right place, here with children just worried to be a good or better enough good (thanks Daniela!) mom
and thanks to all of you who knows our hearts one day touched. Every list is always incomplete.
I realized it’s a LOVE LIST!!!
writing for me is a way of embracing, taking distance and open the hands…
I’m now ready to SHARE THE LOVE I received and I receive with all of you. And I have to be honest, it has been and it’s a hard path for me, I’m not born ready to share, it’s something that asks me to be mindful, to be present.
And this is the gift I prepared for myself:
grounding my body, mind, communication, parenting and wife skills in this new pattern of SHARING IS CARING
(Julia would say METTA-MORPHOSIS) for myself and the people I love, meet, teach, talk to, call…
I want to embrace life with all my body and open every cell to receptiveness, fear, loving kindness, joy, tears,
playfulness, equanimity…love
